So You Messed Up and Had a Bad Day? So What?

So You Messed Up and Had a Bad Day?  So What?

Today wasn't my best.  It started off great, and then something happened, which happens honestly just about every single morning.  One of my kids decided they couldn't get ready on time so I lost it.  My impatience overtook me and on a very important day in her life, I got so upset that she began to cry.  Not a good moment at all.  I felt awful and kept wondering why is it that I continually battle against myself?  Why do I let my emotions get the best of me, and then take it out on the very people I love the most?

The rest of the day wasn't terrible, except that after that moment I was on edge.  Everything that went wrong seemed to irritate me to no end, and I was constantly on everyone’s case.  Ugh.  I don’t like when I act like this.  I know that this is not who I am, or who God has made me to be.  So, what do I do about it?

In the past I would feel terrible.  It would completely ruin not only one day, but my week, and on top of feeling guilty for my actions I would feel in the wrong for feeling guilty and letting it control me.  It was a horrible cycle to be in and I just couldn't get out of it…that is, until the power of God moved in my life. 

I realized, by God’s grace, that the problem wasn't necessarily my actions, but it was my identity.  Not only did I feel bad about what I did, I felt bad about who I was.  My actions defined me.  I thought of myself as a “bad mom and a bad wife.”  I thought I was a failure.  I thought I was stuck in a rut, never to be able to change.  I mean, after all, I was a Christian, right, so I shouldn't act this way.  If I’m a Christian already and act this poorly, then how in the world am I going to show others Christ’s love?  I mean, how can I be qualified to love others if I can’t even love my own children right?

This thought pattern is so wrong and such a trap from the enemy.  So what do we do about it?  What do we do when we go down the wrong path one moment or one day and lose it? 

We get back up.  We repent.  We move on.  We don’t let it define who we really are.  That is precisely what I’ve done today.  Yes it’s been bad.  Yes I've fallen short.  Yes, I've missed the mark.  BUT, I've repented.  I’ve asked for forgiveness from my daughter and the others I've not treated well.  That’s all I can do.  My actions today don’t define who I am at my core.  I messed up, but I am a beautiful creation of God.  I am a wonderful mother and wife.  I am free in Christ to be ALL that He made me to be.  I don’t stay down in the dumps anymore. I don’t dwell on it and let Satan try to tell me that I’m no good.  The fact is, I’m great, because God made me that way.  There is absolutely NOTHING else I can be, but great. Nothing!  Whether I act like it every day might change, but I know without a doubt in the core of my being that I am amazing.  It’s just a fact.  It’s the absolute truth. 

In the mean time I will work on my actions so they are more like Christ.  Yes, He convicts me and prunes me because He loves me. His love empowers me to overcome.  Christ does NOT condemn his children.

So you messed up?  What are you going to do about it?  Will it ruin your life?  Ruin your kids’ lives and your family’s life?  Absolutely not!! Get back up and run your race.  You can’t run very fast if you’re always beat up and lying on the ground.  God wants you to know that there is absolutely nothing you can do that He hasn't forgiven.  Receive it, make things right, FORGIVE YOURSELF, and move on.  Yes, it’s that simple.  Jesus paid your debt, you don’t owe anything.  Jesus didn't die on the cross for us to wallow in self pity and condemnation.  He died to set us free.  And We ARE FREE INDEED!! 

thoughts on friends...

Friends. How I love friends.  Sometimes they are just what the doctor ordered.  God made friends, and oh how I thank Him for that precious gift.  Whether the friend comes in the form of a sister, mother, husband or someone else God divinely places in your life, they are a gift.  Whether they encourage you with a word spoken at just the right time or if God uses them to challenge you in a way that’s just plain uncomfortable, they are a treasure. If they get under your skin because of theyway they act or if they are easy to love, they are in your life for a reason. 

Friends to me are simply family in disguise.  I believe just as much as God places us in a family, He also divinely places us with friends.  Friends that are, just like family, entrusted to our care.  We are not to take these for granted.  They are precious, just as family is precious.  Just as much as your children are a gift, so is a friend.  As I once heard it put, blood is thicker than water, but the Spirit is  thicker than blood.  When God gives us brothers and sisters in the Lord, they ARE family.  They are meant to be encouraged, loved, and challenged.  They are meant to be close to our hearts and souls.  We are meant not only to love blood family deeply, but also love the family of God deeply as well.  People are divinely placed in our lives to for us to learn from and be a blessing to. 

So many times when things get tough between friends we want to run.  We want to give up.  After all, they’re not family, so there’s no real commitment there, right?  Can I be honest with you?  I believe friends are for eternity.  When God puts them in your life we are to be committed to them.  We are to be the best friend we can be.  Sure, you can’t be that way with every person that crosses your path, but you know which ones play that part in your life.  There are people you know are in your life to bless you, challenge you and to encourage you.  Just like with family, there are some friends that are simply a bit strange and very difficult to be around.  But without them, our lives would simply be dull. 

I have many friends, and what’s great is that every single one is different.  Every one of them challenges me in a different way.  I’m called to steward these precious people the best way I know how.  They are gifts.  They might only be in my life for a season, but they are in my heart forever.  God calls us to be friends with certain people He knows we need.  Sometimes it’s not always who we want it to be, but it is always who is best for us and our growth. 

I have learned so much about friendship.  Loving someone when you don’t feel or receive love in return is key.  Friendship is always putting yourself out there. Friendship is always about the other person, never about you.  Friendship is not about what you can get from someone, but what you can give to them.  Friendship is loving someone in spite of their flaws…and enjoying the differences. Friendship is vulnerability. Friendship is commitment…even when someone lets you down, you love.  After all, that’s what Jesus does, right?  Friendship is giving, receiving, and always laying down your life for the other.  Friendship is fun.  Friendship is fulfilling.  Friendship spurs you to be closer to the ultimate friend…the perfect friend, Jesus.  He’s the friend we all aspire to be like.  The friend who sticks closer than family.  The friend who constantly pursues even though He is rejected over and over again.  The one who gave up His life for us. 

How about you?  Do you give up your life for the people God placed in your path?  I’m not talking about your kids here, but the relationships outside of your family…We all give up our lives for our children to a degree.  Do you lay down your time for a friend in need?  Do you lay down your life for others?

Sounds an awful lot like marriage, doesn't it?  It’s NEVER about what we can get.  We need to get all we can from Jesus.  Be full of His love and acceptance and then Go out and give.  Give love with no expectations. Love and be grateful for everyone God puts in your life.  You never know when they won't be there anymore!